Goodbye, Dr. D

Met with the PsyD today to have a conversation neither of us wanted. She was friendly with my psychiatrist (Dr. D), so this hit her hard, too. She didn’t even get the luxury of being contacted by Dr. D’s office. She found out because one of her clients came in to get a referral for a new psychiatrist. I guess it’s been one after the other this week. Dr. D only referred people to two therapists, so the PsyD’s having to deal with this over and over. I can’t even imagine what that feels like.

I’ve been so blessed through this last year. I was blessed to find Dr. D last May. I was blessed that she immediately put me on the right medication. I was blessed that she referred me to the PsyD, who has been an absolute rock through everything. I’ve been blessed to have Mom and Kalynne and Taylor by my side even when I hid away for weeks. I’ve been blessed to have Lady A (not the band), who did so much for my self-esteem without realizing it. I can’t express my gratitude enough for these people. I love them more than I can say.

Life is hectic, filled with ups and downs even without my crazy brain, but I’m one of the lucky ones. Dr. D made sure of that.

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5 thoughts on “Goodbye, Dr. D

  1. I’m a little envious – I’ve only had one encounter with a psychiatrist, and it was…okay. She didn’t believe I really had ADD, even after tests said I did (though in her defense, I DID pass the computer one because even though it was boring as my on personal hell, I still managed to think of it as a computer game) and the medication she gave me anyway showed an obvious improvement. She didn’t take into account my size or my equally small drug history and gave me too big a dose to start off with. She said I definitely, absolutely would not have withdrawals if I just stopped taking the medication over the summer (in totally unrelated news, I know from personal experience a good way to describe a bad withdrawal as what it might feel like if invisible claws were raking your soul out of your body as slowly and excruciatingly as possible). Sheesh, you’re right – good doctors are very hard to come by.
    You’ll still have your PsyD then? Will you still need a psychiatrist? I didn’t stick on with mine after I gave up medication (it ceased to work after I recovered from my withdrawal.)

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    • I remember you telling me about that when Tay and I dropped off the cactus. XD I can’t imagine having everything completely silenced. I still want a spark of crazy. My medication has made a huge difference in being able to manage the little voices in my head, and it’s evident in my writing.

      I plan to keep my PsyD as long as I can. She’s pretty great: we have similar interests and she’s totally capable of carrying on a philosophical conversation. I am going to start up with another psychiatrist. I’d actually planned to go in to get permission to increase my medication–this manufacturer doesn’t seem to be as strong as the last one and I’m having some pretty significant ups and downs.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Additionally, a psychiatrist should listen to you. A potentially positive reaction is definitely worth pursuing, even if it means messing around with the dosage. If the psychiatrist won’t listen, find one who will.

      Liked by 1 person

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