Out of the Hole!

Yay! So I’ve been all nutty about trying to detach from work, not get overwhelmed, etc., etc., etc. Well, I finally downloaded my secret weapon onto my computer (it’s a specific album, which I have listened to approximately 97 times [we’re talking literally]), and suddenly–detached! In fact, not just detached, but completely sunken into my favorite fiction.

I’ve written for years and years, and this one particular story is my favorite. Yesterday, I added 2500, getting me out of the hole where I’d been stuck for over a year. Today, I added 3600 words, totaling a net accomplishment of exiting Chapter Five and entering Chapter Nine. I’m elated. Beyond any other progress I’ve made this year, in my job, in my personal life, this is a crowning achievement for me.

Sometimes, when I haven’t written in awhile, I wonder if writing is really where my passion lies. I wonder if I’m just romanticizing the memory of finishing my first manuscript. I didn’t make any progress on the novel last year, and 2014 went down as a terrible year for me. Today, this feeling, this high from writing 3 1/2 measly chapters of a draft of the first book of a long series, beats all of the great moments I’ve had this year.

I am grateful that I’m able to achieve this feeling, this moment. Without my mom or my therapist or encouragement from you guys, I would still be a mess. Chances are I still am a mess, but right now I’m a happy mess. When I talk about wanting life-work-school balance, this is “life.” This is absolutely the life part. As much as I want to get back on my feet relationship-wise, men can wait if it means I get this back.


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