Seeing Friends and Admitting Weaknesses

One of the many things that makes life livable is miniature blessings that happen without warning.

Yesterday morning, I received an email from a former coworker in Seattle saying, “Just wanted to let you know that Elizabeth and I are in Phoenix for a week.” This coworker, Ray, and I were in the same new hire class two years ago (God, has it really been that long?? Where is the time going?). Elizabeth was our fantastic trainer, who taught me a million small things that I still use everyday, from understanding the company software to understanding true customer service. In her care, a customer with $100 to his name is going to get the same excellent treatment as a customer in first class. She doesn’t speak ill of anyone (something I’m working on and failing miserably at). She’s respectful, kind, honest, funny, smart, wise. . . .

She’s been working over the last two years to pass those traits off to the “new hires,” like me and Ray (there were 7 of us; no one’s been hired since). Ray’s been taking notes, and I can see the effect she’s had on him–but he’s also a little like me on the opinionated side of things.

All of that to say, I got to see them yesterday. We hung out in a hallway and talked for an hour. They filled me in on the goings-on back in Washington. We talked about the challenges of the merger. We talked about how excited we are for switching our software, and the challenges that arise from training 30,000 people to think differently (I really want to geek out here and talk about the differences between SHARES [US Airways computer system] and SABRE [American’s computer system], but I’m already rambling and I’m pretty sure zero of my readers have airline/travel agency experience).

Seeing friendly faces–seeing people who knew me before I knew anything–seeing the person who made me think about how SHARES works rather than memorize its functions–I could not have asked for a better surprise than seeing Elizabeth and Ray yesterday.

On the mental front, I did really well at work today. First, it turns out that the world doesn’t burn if I don’t answer emails every day. Nothing major happened while I was on vacation, which helped me de-stress a lot.

Following that discovery, I decided to approach my boss with some of my personal concerns. I told her about my anxiety attack last weekend and what caused it. I explained the trouble I’m having prioritizing my work (I don’t multitask well, or at all, and so I have to prioritize or fail). I explained that I am not a natural leader or disciplinarian, and to be successful in those areas, I need to be taught.

We talked through some of the finer aspects of my job, which helped relieve the stress. She wasn’t sure which of my projects should be given higher priority, but after talking for awhile, I started to see the domino-style relationship between the projects. It was easy to determine which project was the first “domino” at that point.

So, professionally, things are looking up. Personally, I’m still hesitant about social interactions. The PhD and I met again this week. She wanted to talk about my family, but we never got there. We talked instead about the circumstances of my love life (God, I feel stupid even saying that phrase . . . love life, yech), and the disappointment and distrust that built up over the years alongside the happiness and love. I’m a bonafide head-case in the personal relationships department.

The good news is, I get to put off my next mental breakdown (the result of my lost friend returning to Arizona) by not being in Arizona when he gets back. My newly-graduated sister and I are taking off to the Pacific Northwest on Monday in search of beaches, tolerable weather, and not being in Arizona. At least, that’s what I’m going for. She might have different ideas.

Remind me . . . I definitely want to write a totally not-anyone’s-opinion-but-my-own post about the construct of marriage in the 21st century, and I definitely need to write 4 flash fictions before tomorrow morning.

God, it feels good to be feeling better.


Now that you've read my thoughts, what are yours?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s