The Story of Orange Juice

In grand December fashion, everyone I know is sick. Between family, friends, coworkers, and classmates coming down with various communicable viruses, I’m dodging biological bullets at every turn. This requires added protection:

Orange juice

Satan’s piss is unfortunately the only thing that keeps me from getting sick during the last month of the year.

In case you can’t tell from the caption, I hate orange juice. It’s literally the worst juice of all juices (will amend: I have never tried prune juice in living memory, but I can’t imagine it’s any nastier than oj)(second set of parentheses to say I need to stop hanging out with people who use “literally” like it’s literally the best word ever).

In the Trembly household, you either prevent winter illnesses by drinking orange juice or Airborne. Now, I am all for not getting sick, but isn’t chemistry advanced enough to make things that make you healthy also taste good? (Preventing myself from going on a rant about this lovely disorder, in which all of the healthy things that also taste good try to kill people.)

In order to get the bottle of antioxidants and vitamin C, I did what might be the laziest thing I’ve done all year. You know how you walk into a grocery store and you see someone in her pajamas and you go, “Doesn’t she have the decency to at least put on a real shirt?” That person is already one step ahead of me, since she actually changed into pajamas before going to bed. I rolled out of bed wearing the clothes I had on the night before, put on boots, and headed for the store.

Why share that story? To me, it’s a reminder about judging the book by the cover. I know that yesterday morning, I looked totally together when I wasn’t at all. It made me wonder what the other stories were. The lady who chose not to put her groceries in plastic bags, the gentleman who made a sharp turn into the cereal aisle to stare at nothing in particular for two solid minutes–what were their stories?

Do you know what yours is?

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12 thoughts on “The Story of Orange Juice

  1. I don’t think I have heard of anyone not liking orange juice! My dad always says that orange juice will make you feel better, so I have been chugging away 🙂

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    • Hatred of orange juice was one of those things that made me very different in high school, haha. I don’t know why–oranges are the only citrus I don’t like. Best of luck in warding off the illnesses this winter!

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  2. hahahah the grocery store: part necessity, part entertainment. I also am not a fan of oj but felt a cold coming on the other day and had to spare 4 dollars to save myself from getting sick on the very inconvenient week of finals. Thanks for the post, very entertaining rant off orange juice!

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    • Thank you! I’ll have to add mimosas to my “To Try” list (I’ll try it once). I’m usually set with a Whiskey Sangria or a Chocolate Espresso Martini (and apparently, I only drink at Carly’s Bistro, haha).

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